Marc Andreessen on a recent podcast with David Senra made a very provocative remark: “You should have zero levels of introspection. Just move forward.”
For a long time now, I have had psychological therapy. Some of these people have asked me to “think about it.” And here is an extremely successful person, being listened to by me—someone who should be doing better—and thinking, “Well have I been wrong all along?”
All this time—I thought I may have been building self-awareness. And yet—maybe what has been going on is the complete opposite of that. Introspection does not build self-awareness—it builds self-delusion.
Which leads me to the question—¿What exactly is introspection and how is it different from reflection? ¿Should we stop reflecting as well? ¿What then is extrospection? (If this even is a thing.
1 – ¿What exactly is introspection and how is it different from reflection?
Let’s go to the dictionary (in this case the Cambridge Dictionary)
Introspection:
– examination of and attention to your own ideas, thoughts, and feelings:
Reflection:
1) the image of something in a mirror or on any reflective surface
2) the return of light, heat, sound, or energy from a surface
3) a sign or result of something
4) serious and careful thought:
Wow—they could not be more different. Introspection is about attention. Reflection—is about energy, results and thought.
You would think that introspection would help you to think clearly—yet, we do not even see thought as a verb in the definition. It is much more about looking at something and letting it sit. Letting it talk to you. Letting it fester.
Reflection on the other hand is about action.
We want to see something in the world. We want to bring something out into the world. Reflection is social.
2) ¿Should we stop reflecting as well?
We have pre-supposed that we should stop introspecting. Let’s first think about that.
And to me—it seems like we should. Introspection is passive—and this life is clearly about action. It’s about making the word flesh, and creating what the Gods channel through us.
It’s not so much about admiring that from within. We are vessels—and we should ride the waves. It’s not about stopping when the sirens ring. It’s about tying yourself to the vessel and continuing. We don’t stop and watch. We think things through.
Getting clarity on the difference allows us to see this:
Introspection is what happens when you don’t really have someone to talk to.
When you can’t leave it out on the floor.
When you can’t externalize how you feel.
When you don’t have any friends.
So don’t introspect. Reflect with friends. It’s good to go into a “Hall of Mirrors” at time.
Mirror neurons—or the neurons that fire when you do something with someone else—are responsible for helping you understand others. They are what fire when we learn from someone. And if you are prescient enough to step outside the “Hall of Mirrors” every once in a while—the “Mirrors” will be different enough that you begin to see how the shape of the mirror can become an Optical Illusion.
You begin to see the world in a place of fantasy. You begin to put on glasses—and from here on out—your fatness, your skinniness, your shortness and your tallness—though they may be grounded in reality, they may also be grounded in illusion.
You begin to look for the reality—not by feeling, but my measuring. Science happens when you go outside.
You can’t feel yourself through an experiment.
Go out and touch stuff.
3) ¿What then is extrospection?
Well—science kind of is. But science is systematic. Extrospection is more organic—happening here, now all the time. And an extrospector is someone who notices. Notices the world around them—and has the potential to do something because of that. And then—they also notice you—and they might be able to help you understand how you feel, clarify what you think, and become a part of your life.
When introspecting—you become self-absorbed, when extrospecting, you are here to serve others. And service is useful. Service makes you useful. You become important to us.
So don’t introspect. Reflect. And Reflect puts your light into the world. So we can all see it. Enjoy it. And allows us to not lose ourself in the darkness.
Oh—and one more thing…
I have to say it in Spanish—because it comes from an emotional core:
Las amistades multiplican los gozos y dividen los dolores.
Friends double our joys and halve our sorrows.
Share with friends. Don’t introspect. And if someone is introspecting—loop them out. The world will have all the feedback they need. When you stay inwards—there is nothing to feed on—you will only starve your existential self.